Sex and Cymbalism
She’s a blonde beach bunny TV star. He’s a tattooed rock star. Together they’re… not that different from any other young, dim couple in love. There are no drug-crazed orgies – just the same old scene with a little money thrown into the deal.
Yes, this is the famous “home movies” tape that was allegedly stolen from the famed couple and sold over the internet. Actually, I don’t have the tape – I got the special edition uncut DVD. I don’t know what was edited out of the tape for the cut version, but I can guess. First to go would be the Lee’s wedding, which is long and boring, despite the fact that the wedding party is dressed as various space aliens. They might have trimmed Tommy practicing on the drums, and Pam playing with the dogs.
To tell the truth, I found this collection to be rather touching, because it’s obvious that the famous pair are in love (at least in that goofy baby-talk way). With all the tattle-tale tabloid material and scandal we wade through, it’s heartening to see a boring and happy couple hang out for a while. Before the wedding, Tommy does most of the shooting. He tries to get Pam to camp it up in the bath tub, but she’s shy. When she has the camera, he’s reluctant to play. It’s not until after the wedding that the two start to let their hair down and cavort in boats and cars, and especially on a fishing trip to Lake Mead (sic) when Pam suspects she’s pregnant.
As for the hardcore material – these are two good looking people having enthusiastic sex. Not particularly satisfying, since it’s all shot without a tripod (unless you count Tommy), and the camera is handled by Pam during most of the blurry action. And it doesn’t even last that long. I should be grateful, I guess – at least Roseanne’s private video library hasn’t been made public.
One question, though: How did that pool cue get into the heating duct?